Presidential Flash Report: Hayden's Cold Shower

Malacanan Palace
28 May 2009

At the Senate today, one man was able to do what Hayden should have done in the first place: Taking a cold shower. Abner Afuang, whose life was made into a movie starring Philip Salvador, doused water at the embattled doctor at the start of today's Senate Hearing (Chismis) on the sex video scandal........(Look at the Senate treated like a beauty parlor!)



I don't know about you but Hayden blew it. That was his chance to get any kind of dignity back. So what if he got shot by doing that? That would have been the perfect exit! I would have jumped up, caught Afuang myself and kicked the living shit out of him. I mean WTF! You can cuss at me, give me the finger or whatever...but water? in my face? infront of millions of people? That is akin to being spit on or being bitch slapped. I bet even the most perverse person in this world (if there is one besides you) has lost whatever ounce of respect they have for you. You are now ALONE. Pati mga manyak na tulad mo kinahihiya ka na! Someone dares to pull that shit on me, that person would have been dead by now. Hayden, you are not just a pervert of a highest kind but a pussy of the highest degree...Let me say it again P-U-S-S-Y!

Honestly, this shit has gone too far even for my standards. I wish all of you would just go the fuck away....... Katrina to Palawan...Belo back to the 1950s....Hayden to hell....Bong Revilla to Cavite....ugh!

Now that I got that last paragraph out of the way.....no actually go...make a fool of yourselves. Even Jerry Springer or Howard Stern could have never thought of this.

You blew it man....you blew it.

(Sgd) H.E. President of the Philippines
28 May 2009